So today on the way to yoga, I heard that Terry McMillan is getting divorced. Turns out her book, HOW STELLA GOT HER GROOVE BACK (about a 42-year-old woman who went to the islands after her divorce, met a HOTTT 20 year old man and fell in love) was autobiographical. Her now-26-year-old husband, though, is gay. He claims he didn't know when he married her -- she claims he used her to get into the US, since he wasn't a citizen. Regardless, the court just ordered her to pay him 2K a month in spousal support and 50K in his attorney fees (covering his run at her money). I guess his dog grooming business doesn't bring in large amounts of cash. She caught him spending hours talking to a "friend" long distance, hanging out for long amounts of time at his place of business and (this one would be the kicker for me) she busted him having cyber sex on an online gay chat group. Um, yeah. That would be a hint he was gay.
What made me laugh out loud, though, was when the two DJ’s who were discussing this had the following conversation:
Guy DJ: “Wait, so she’s paying him?”
Girl DJ: “Yeah, well, she’s an author. They make a lot of money.”
(I snicker)
Guy DJ: “That much money? I mean, she’s paying to support him and for his attorney fees.”
Girl DJ: “Authors make a lot of money, man. I’m telling you.”
(I begin to both laugh and sob a little at this oh-so-untrue statement.)
Guy DJ: “Really? Maybe I should write a book then.”
Girl DJ: “Me too.”
Which reminded me of this wedding I went to a couple months ago.
Everyone was writing a book. Everyone. And they knew a million people who were also writing books, or selling books, or who had friends who were writing and/or selling books. I patiently asked them what kind of book they were writing. “Well,” they said. “I haven’t really decided yet. Probably something about shoes or something. It’s hard to explain.” Huh. I nodded wisely. “Well, I’ve heard shoes are really in right now,” I said and gulped another mixed drink from the open bar. No wonder so many authors have been alcoholics. Between accidentally marrying gay men, making little or no money even when they’re writing decent books and having every person they meet think this is the easiest job on the planet, what else is there to do but drink?
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5 comments:
People really do think all writers are like kazillionaires. So many people have asked me how much money I make, as if I've won the lottery or something. If they only knew...One published author, and I can't remember who, likes to say: Buy a book and feed an author. It's the truth!
When people ask me that question, I get a bit miffed. I mean, that's just, well, RUDE. They'd be offended if I asked them what they made, yet there is something about being an author that makes people think it's all right to ask. Weird, isn't it?
I've had people say "Well now that you're a bigtime author..." I just sigh and roll my eyes. I hope they are joking. And it isn't even out yet. I shudder to think what they will do once it does come out.
DH's family all thinks when I sell my first book I'll be paying off everybody's debts. DH is more realistic. He would like for me to make enough money to cover my book and office supply addiction.
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